Hi Guise!
It has been a long time since I have written! I have been so super busy with work and other odds and ends that I just never got around to writing much. That and the fact that I didn't particularly feel like writing for a while because I knew all I would do is moan and write useless ramblings. I feel more in the writing mood now so here we go :P
Work has been super duper crazy this week and last. The launch of Microsoft Office 2010 happened this week so that typically cause dpanic and stress at the office seeing as we have to rollout all the point of sale. Throw into the equation that there was a public holiday (Youth Day) this week (Which is actually today mind you) and you have a super busy week. Lets not forget that the world cup is currently taking place. That bundles with schools on holiday which = busy malls. I am going to watch Argentina play South Korea tomorrow and I am so excited for it!!! Due to that though, I swapped my public holiday with tomorrow so I could have the day off. So I ended up working today which was irritatingly annoying because who the hell works on a public holiday? It was all worth it though, seeing as I have tomorrow off. South Korea beat Greece 2-0. I watched that game and was very impressed with the way the Koreans played, so I'm very keen to see them play Argentina :D YAY! I reckon that tomorrow or sometime I will try blog out some of the scores and a general summary of the forst set of games that have been played. The upsets, surprises, disappointments and so on. I'm sure Chello will read it and tell me I'm wrong about lots of it but oh well :)
South Africa are playing Uruguay tonight! the opening game was great, and even though we didn't win, a draw was decent enough. Out of the group I want Mexico and South Africa to go through anyways, so a draw doesn't really bother me. Lets just hope that both South Africa and Mexico can sort out France and Uruguay (who also had a 0-0 draw so the whole group is on 1 point at the moment) I am going to a fan park with my siblings and friends tonight so I'm quite amped for the atmosphere and vibe. I must say that I am so happy with South Africa as a country at the moment. All the tourists who are here seem to be having a blast of a time and they comment on what a friendly nation we are. I hope they go home and recommend us to their family and friends, because media can totally distort a view of a place, and I'm pretty sure most of the media overseas are moaning about one or other thing here. Oh well, thats my rant for this blog. Good luck SA! Do us proud!
Me -> out
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Friday, June 4, 2010
This Is the Part Where You Can be Like "I TOLD YOU SO!"
Hi Guys
I'm just warning you that today's blog is absent of rainbows and butterflies, puppies and kittens, and all those other nice things that make us go "Awwwwwwwww..." Instead it is filled with anger and sadness, annoyance and more sadness, and all those other stupid things that make us go "Sigh..." YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! Full rant ahead.
Yesterday I got an sms from Robs, inviting me to dinner with her and Amber. I decided to skip the dinner part and just meet them for coffee afterwards. I got to Bedford Square, and met up with Amber, Robs, Clare, and Liz. I was like :O I'm the only guy what the hell. Anyways I got over that and we all ordered our drinks. Amber ordered a cocktail which I think was a Strawberry Daiquiri. It was her birthday the next day, so her and Robs wanted to go do something until midnight to celebrate. I didn't mind going along, because I didn't haver work the next day. They wanted to go to CCHQ, which isn't really a club in certain ways, but they play loud music, have a dance floor, and a bar loaded with alcohol, so I guess it is a club at the end of the day. Some of our friends we don't see very often hang out there, so we kind of expected to see them there. I was skeptical about it, and I held my tongue because afterall, I last saw Amber 3 weeks ago and
I damn sure as hell wanted to be there to celebrate with her. Also if I didn't go, they probably wouldn't have gone either because there would be no male with them, so I didn't want to let Robs or Amber down.
So Robs dropped her car off at home, and I picked her and Amber up from there. We headed over to CCHQ and parked outside. The first thing that they noticed was a car outside. Amber asked if it was Rudi's car in front of us. In my head I was just hoping it wasn't, because Rudi is Amber's ex boyfriend, and I can't help but suspect that she still likes him. We walked inside and one of our friends Cleo, nearly did a back flip and couldn't stop yelling when she saw us. You must understand, Amber, Robs and I aren't huge clubbers or anything, so this really was the biggest surprise to her. Emma and Jeanne were also there, so once again, I was the only guy. Cleo worked there, so she left us to do our own thing and Emma and Jeanne stayed with her.
Robs, Amber and I headed to the bar to get something to drink. I have NO problem with drinking, I really don't. I just hate it when people go out of their way to get as drunk as possible, that just irritates me. We all orded something, Robs and I a Smirnoff Spin, and Amber a Red Square. We just sat and surveyed the surroundings. I laughed at them and teased them because they weren't as used to being out at clubs like I was (not that I'm a clubber, but I have had my fair share of experiences.) To this day I have still not been drunk, due to the fact that I have a high alcohol tolerance, the fact that I know enough is enough, and the fact that I pace myself. Amber finished her Savannah and I asked her if she wanted anything else, probably very stupid of me. She wanted a red Square. Robs and I were barely half done with our first drinks.
Out of nowhere Kyle and Rudi popped up and came to say hi to us. Amber used to have a crush on Kyle, and even when we were dating, she told me that one time she wanted to kiss him, not a very nice thing to hear. I know Amber, I am convinced she likes Rudi still. Normally I think she would have better control of herself, but she has a very low alcohol tolerance, so it was all mixing up in her system already. Maybe I was being paranoid, but she couldn't keep her eyes off of him. I stomached it and ignored it. Robs and I finished our drink, and Amber asked me for another. It was the last drink I was going to buy her (or so I thought) She was on her 3rd drink already, we had only had one.
The night went on, and I really can't blame Amber for wanting to just let loose, because the last time she had fun and time to do anything was her LAST holiday. She had just broken up so she was enjoying herself as much as possible. That and the fact that it was her birthday in an hour or so. Kyle and Rudi disappeared off somewhere, and whether she was aware of it or not, Amber kept asking where they were. Not to mention that very often Amber would just leave me and Robs without saying anything, and just disappear off to chat to Cleo and co, or to just vanish. If I remember correctly, Kyle bought her a Jagerbomb in celebration of her birthday. Robs and I watched her drink it and we both secretly agreed that maybe she should stop now.
Amber asked me if she could have another Red Square. I offered her a coke. She just looked at me and said if not a Red Square could she try something else? I told her that I wasn't buying her anything else other then a coke. She looked like she got upset, said don't worry then, and then she walked away.I was like ok...
I was ordering drinks for me and Robs. I ordered myself a Red Square, and Robs a coke. Amber materialised behind me again and just stood there. I ignored her and took a sip out of the Red Square as soon as it came, just to let her know it was mine and not hers. She saw that and vanished again -_-
It was nearly her birthday, so we were all just waiting. Midnight came, all the girls started screaming like girls do when they get overexcited about certain things, and everybody wished her. She came up to me and asked me if I was still going to buy her that tequila. I sighed, remembering that I said I would buy her one for her birthday. We went to the bar and had one. Before we walked back to the others, she looked around, hugged me quickly and then kissed me. She then walked away.
The rest of the night passed by at a snails pace. All I wanted to do was go home. Amber had stopped asking me for drinks, but it didn't help that she was getting drinks from other friends -_- eventually she headed outside with Kyle to go chill with Rudi and other people outside (they were drinking around the corner) I stomached this too and just let it be. Robs and I chilled inside, letting Amber do her own thing. Eventually Robs asked if maybe we should leave. I agreed because I wanted to leave too. We went outside to find Amber sitting between Kyle and Rudi. I just wished she was more considerate, because my word it was upsetting me a lot, but again I just said to myself its her birthday, let her do what she wants. We told her we were leaving and she was like ok... I also told her that she was coming with us because she was my responsibility. She just looked at me and told me she needed her keys from my car and she didn't want to leave, Kyle or Rudi would give her a lift home. I was like there is no F-ing way in hell I'm leaving her in their hands. Not a chance, jealousy and all that aside, there was no ways I was leaving her to them. She kept saying she wanted her keys and I lost my temper. I told her to come fetch her stupid keys and I walked away to my car which was around the corner. I had full intention to just leave her there then. I needed to get over her, maybe this is exactly what I needed. I got her stuff and started walking back. Kyle had already walked halfway to my car with her. Kyle was telling her to go home, enjoy what memories she had, before it got worse. She held out her hand for her keys, and I told her that I am not giving them to her. Robs, Rudi and Emma met up with us and Kyle asked around telling them to convince Amber to go home. They didn't say anything constructive, and Amber was beyond reasoning now because she was drunk. She asked for her keys again. I stared at her forever, before giving them to her and telling her she's not my responsibility. She told me she knows that. I stormed off, telling Robs that we're leaving. I got in the car, shaking. I'm not used to being angry like that. Ask anybody that knows me personally, I am the least angry person in the world, I have a hell of a lot of patience, but when a girl you care for that deeply, so immensely, practically tells you to fuck off, well I'm sorry that just doesn't go down with me at all.
Robs got in the car, and she was in tears. If its one thing that pissed me off is that yeah fine, Amber can treat me like shit because I'm nice enough to not hold it against her ever, but when she treats Robs like shit, Robs being a pure hearted, sensitive and loving friend, that just makes my blood boil even further. I started the car. I told Robs that I am taking her home and then I'm coming back for Amber, I just needed to vent and drive it off. Robs told me she didn't want to go home, the only reason she suggested it was because she wanted to take Amber with us, and get her away from this place. I sighed and agreed, saying I knew that, but Amber was being stupid. I turned the car off, and told her that we can go wait inside.
Amber and the others were waiting at the door to get back in. They looked surprised to see us back but didn't say anything. I looked at Amber, and she looked at me, we never took our eyes off each others for a long time. Then she turned and was about to walk back in. "Amber..." I pleaded. "Please lets go home." She turned and looked at me. "Dude..." she said, before shaking her head and just walking in. Robs and I stood there, then followed.
I walked past the dance floor to go to the bathroom. There, alone and dancing on the dance floor (by alone I mean she was alone with no friends around her, there were other people dancing) was Amber. Prior to this evening I had never seen Amber dance before in my life, she did earlier with us and her friends. Here she was dancing alone and not shy about it. Alcohol does strange things to confidence levels.
A long time passed... Robs and I just chilled on the couches, or walked around and chatted to other people. Amber was missing, I didn't know where the hell she was. I left it and didn't think about her, or at least tried not to. Eventually I asked Rudi where she was and he said he last saw her upstairs with Kyle. I fully expected them to be making out or something, but I know Kyle is better then that, and he knows my feelings for Amber, and he fully agrees that she can be way confusing. I was relieved to find them just leaning on the railing and chatting. Amber said that we could go home soon. I was like ok... for the life of me I can't remember what else she said, I really can't, but all I remember is losing it and yelling at her. The music was loud, so nobody other then Kyle and her could hear what I was saying. I told her that she was being selfish as usual, thinking about nobody but herself. I told her that although its her birthday it doesn't give her the right to act like this. I told her that she is drunk, and that she is being illogical. I said lots more, and I just let it out. I told her if I never told her, nobody else would ever have the balls to do so, and its something she needs to hear. She looked at me and said that now she's definitely not leaving. She leant on the railing and buried her head in her arms. I told her to stop acting like a flipping retard, before realizing that maybe that was a little harsh. I kept quiet. Kyle then told her that she should go home tonight, and that he and Rudi would party again with her sometime in the future. I sighed and shook my head at him, asking him to give me and Amber a moment. He nodded his head and made his way out. He told me he felt like an ass, and I told him not to worry it's not his fault. I just want to get her home.
I stood next to her and just waited. She looked up at me and told me that she knows she is selfish, but if she wanted to change she would have a long time ago. I told her that I don't expect her to change, I just expect her to be logical and come home. She changed.
Amber: "I don't know why you like me. I don't like you, I don't want to hook up with you, I don't want you to buy me drinks and I don't want to kiss you."
Me: "You don't? Thats strange, because you let me buy you a lot of drinks (my mistake) and you even kissed me."
Amber: "Yeah well. I only do it because I feel sorry for you."
Thats the last thing I expected to hear. That was a real low blow and it hurt. I just stood there, letting it sink in. "Where is Robs?" She asked. I didn't listen. I walked away and left her.
I was shaking again, fighting my hardest to hold my emotions in. I went to the entrance and stood with Robs and Kyle. Amber came down a few minutes later, looking like she was at least ready to go. A song came on and Robs asked Amber to dance. I sighed, because she was finally ready to go. Robs realised this and felt bad, but I told her not to worry, I'll be waiting at the entrance when they are done. It was just me and Kyle. I chatted to him. I always used to chat to Kyle about Amber when me and him did kickboxing together. He knows a lot about us, and he knows exactly how I feel about her. I told him what just happened and he shook his head. I also told him that this was probably exactly what I needed to get over her, because enough is enough. Surprisingly he looked shocked, because I doubt ever imagined me saying I'd get over Amber.
Robs and Amber to the entrance after their song. They said bye to everybody and went to my car. I was quiet. I didn't want to say anything. Nobody said anything as I drove. I dropped Robs off and then proceeded to take Amber home. She turned and stared at me. I didn't turn and ignored her. We got to her house and I took her house keys from her. As I was unlocking her front door she hugged me from behind. I ignored it and carried on unlocking. She went straight to the bathroom once in. I went to the couch and waited for her. I wish I could just be an asshole and tune her off, I really do. Its not in my nature, I just don't have it in me. She got out of the bathroom and walked into the lounge. I got up and told her to please let me out. She stood there. I walked, about to get past her and grabbed me and hugged me. I just stood there, not moving my arms at all. She didn't let go forever. I hate it, I wish I could just get over her. She looked up at me and kissed my cheek, before taking my hand and leading me to her room. Any other guy would tell her to piss off, but I'm not like that. Oh how I wish I was.
We went to her room and lay on her bed. She cuddled next to me and took my hand. She started writing out what I assumed was going to be "Im sorry" but she stopped and put my hand down. She then whispered that she was sorry. My response should have been "Like I care/Oh are you feeling sorry for me/screw you/etc" but instead all I could say was "Its ok." Wtf is wrong with me? I don't know...
Anyways we cuddled and slept, and I left at 5 this morning. I hope she doesn't now assume things are ok between us, because they are not. I lost interest in her, because I saw a different person last night. God help me get over her, please I'm begging you, because no matter how much she screws me over or says horrible things, I can't help but love her. Its a curse, and I hope it will go away.
I'm just warning you that today's blog is absent of rainbows and butterflies, puppies and kittens, and all those other nice things that make us go "Awwwwwwwww..." Instead it is filled with anger and sadness, annoyance and more sadness, and all those other stupid things that make us go "Sigh..." YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! Full rant ahead.
Yesterday I got an sms from Robs, inviting me to dinner with her and Amber. I decided to skip the dinner part and just meet them for coffee afterwards. I got to Bedford Square, and met up with Amber, Robs, Clare, and Liz. I was like :O I'm the only guy what the hell. Anyways I got over that and we all ordered our drinks. Amber ordered a cocktail which I think was a Strawberry Daiquiri. It was her birthday the next day, so her and Robs wanted to go do something until midnight to celebrate. I didn't mind going along, because I didn't haver work the next day. They wanted to go to CCHQ, which isn't really a club in certain ways, but they play loud music, have a dance floor, and a bar loaded with alcohol, so I guess it is a club at the end of the day. Some of our friends we don't see very often hang out there, so we kind of expected to see them there. I was skeptical about it, and I held my tongue because afterall, I last saw Amber 3 weeks ago and
I damn sure as hell wanted to be there to celebrate with her. Also if I didn't go, they probably wouldn't have gone either because there would be no male with them, so I didn't want to let Robs or Amber down.
So Robs dropped her car off at home, and I picked her and Amber up from there. We headed over to CCHQ and parked outside. The first thing that they noticed was a car outside. Amber asked if it was Rudi's car in front of us. In my head I was just hoping it wasn't, because Rudi is Amber's ex boyfriend, and I can't help but suspect that she still likes him. We walked inside and one of our friends Cleo, nearly did a back flip and couldn't stop yelling when she saw us. You must understand, Amber, Robs and I aren't huge clubbers or anything, so this really was the biggest surprise to her. Emma and Jeanne were also there, so once again, I was the only guy. Cleo worked there, so she left us to do our own thing and Emma and Jeanne stayed with her.
Robs, Amber and I headed to the bar to get something to drink. I have NO problem with drinking, I really don't. I just hate it when people go out of their way to get as drunk as possible, that just irritates me. We all orded something, Robs and I a Smirnoff Spin, and Amber a Red Square. We just sat and surveyed the surroundings. I laughed at them and teased them because they weren't as used to being out at clubs like I was (not that I'm a clubber, but I have had my fair share of experiences.) To this day I have still not been drunk, due to the fact that I have a high alcohol tolerance, the fact that I know enough is enough, and the fact that I pace myself. Amber finished her Savannah and I asked her if she wanted anything else, probably very stupid of me. She wanted a red Square. Robs and I were barely half done with our first drinks.
Out of nowhere Kyle and Rudi popped up and came to say hi to us. Amber used to have a crush on Kyle, and even when we were dating, she told me that one time she wanted to kiss him, not a very nice thing to hear. I know Amber, I am convinced she likes Rudi still. Normally I think she would have better control of herself, but she has a very low alcohol tolerance, so it was all mixing up in her system already. Maybe I was being paranoid, but she couldn't keep her eyes off of him. I stomached it and ignored it. Robs and I finished our drink, and Amber asked me for another. It was the last drink I was going to buy her (or so I thought) She was on her 3rd drink already, we had only had one.
The night went on, and I really can't blame Amber for wanting to just let loose, because the last time she had fun and time to do anything was her LAST holiday. She had just broken up so she was enjoying herself as much as possible. That and the fact that it was her birthday in an hour or so. Kyle and Rudi disappeared off somewhere, and whether she was aware of it or not, Amber kept asking where they were. Not to mention that very often Amber would just leave me and Robs without saying anything, and just disappear off to chat to Cleo and co, or to just vanish. If I remember correctly, Kyle bought her a Jagerbomb in celebration of her birthday. Robs and I watched her drink it and we both secretly agreed that maybe she should stop now.
Amber asked me if she could have another Red Square. I offered her a coke. She just looked at me and said if not a Red Square could she try something else? I told her that I wasn't buying her anything else other then a coke. She looked like she got upset, said don't worry then, and then she walked away.I was like ok...
I was ordering drinks for me and Robs. I ordered myself a Red Square, and Robs a coke. Amber materialised behind me again and just stood there. I ignored her and took a sip out of the Red Square as soon as it came, just to let her know it was mine and not hers. She saw that and vanished again -_-
It was nearly her birthday, so we were all just waiting. Midnight came, all the girls started screaming like girls do when they get overexcited about certain things, and everybody wished her. She came up to me and asked me if I was still going to buy her that tequila. I sighed, remembering that I said I would buy her one for her birthday. We went to the bar and had one. Before we walked back to the others, she looked around, hugged me quickly and then kissed me. She then walked away.
The rest of the night passed by at a snails pace. All I wanted to do was go home. Amber had stopped asking me for drinks, but it didn't help that she was getting drinks from other friends -_- eventually she headed outside with Kyle to go chill with Rudi and other people outside (they were drinking around the corner) I stomached this too and just let it be. Robs and I chilled inside, letting Amber do her own thing. Eventually Robs asked if maybe we should leave. I agreed because I wanted to leave too. We went outside to find Amber sitting between Kyle and Rudi. I just wished she was more considerate, because my word it was upsetting me a lot, but again I just said to myself its her birthday, let her do what she wants. We told her we were leaving and she was like ok... I also told her that she was coming with us because she was my responsibility. She just looked at me and told me she needed her keys from my car and she didn't want to leave, Kyle or Rudi would give her a lift home. I was like there is no F-ing way in hell I'm leaving her in their hands. Not a chance, jealousy and all that aside, there was no ways I was leaving her to them. She kept saying she wanted her keys and I lost my temper. I told her to come fetch her stupid keys and I walked away to my car which was around the corner. I had full intention to just leave her there then. I needed to get over her, maybe this is exactly what I needed. I got her stuff and started walking back. Kyle had already walked halfway to my car with her. Kyle was telling her to go home, enjoy what memories she had, before it got worse. She held out her hand for her keys, and I told her that I am not giving them to her. Robs, Rudi and Emma met up with us and Kyle asked around telling them to convince Amber to go home. They didn't say anything constructive, and Amber was beyond reasoning now because she was drunk. She asked for her keys again. I stared at her forever, before giving them to her and telling her she's not my responsibility. She told me she knows that. I stormed off, telling Robs that we're leaving. I got in the car, shaking. I'm not used to being angry like that. Ask anybody that knows me personally, I am the least angry person in the world, I have a hell of a lot of patience, but when a girl you care for that deeply, so immensely, practically tells you to fuck off, well I'm sorry that just doesn't go down with me at all.
Robs got in the car, and she was in tears. If its one thing that pissed me off is that yeah fine, Amber can treat me like shit because I'm nice enough to not hold it against her ever, but when she treats Robs like shit, Robs being a pure hearted, sensitive and loving friend, that just makes my blood boil even further. I started the car. I told Robs that I am taking her home and then I'm coming back for Amber, I just needed to vent and drive it off. Robs told me she didn't want to go home, the only reason she suggested it was because she wanted to take Amber with us, and get her away from this place. I sighed and agreed, saying I knew that, but Amber was being stupid. I turned the car off, and told her that we can go wait inside.
Amber and the others were waiting at the door to get back in. They looked surprised to see us back but didn't say anything. I looked at Amber, and she looked at me, we never took our eyes off each others for a long time. Then she turned and was about to walk back in. "Amber..." I pleaded. "Please lets go home." She turned and looked at me. "Dude..." she said, before shaking her head and just walking in. Robs and I stood there, then followed.
I walked past the dance floor to go to the bathroom. There, alone and dancing on the dance floor (by alone I mean she was alone with no friends around her, there were other people dancing) was Amber. Prior to this evening I had never seen Amber dance before in my life, she did earlier with us and her friends. Here she was dancing alone and not shy about it. Alcohol does strange things to confidence levels.
A long time passed... Robs and I just chilled on the couches, or walked around and chatted to other people. Amber was missing, I didn't know where the hell she was. I left it and didn't think about her, or at least tried not to. Eventually I asked Rudi where she was and he said he last saw her upstairs with Kyle. I fully expected them to be making out or something, but I know Kyle is better then that, and he knows my feelings for Amber, and he fully agrees that she can be way confusing. I was relieved to find them just leaning on the railing and chatting. Amber said that we could go home soon. I was like ok... for the life of me I can't remember what else she said, I really can't, but all I remember is losing it and yelling at her. The music was loud, so nobody other then Kyle and her could hear what I was saying. I told her that she was being selfish as usual, thinking about nobody but herself. I told her that although its her birthday it doesn't give her the right to act like this. I told her that she is drunk, and that she is being illogical. I said lots more, and I just let it out. I told her if I never told her, nobody else would ever have the balls to do so, and its something she needs to hear. She looked at me and said that now she's definitely not leaving. She leant on the railing and buried her head in her arms. I told her to stop acting like a flipping retard, before realizing that maybe that was a little harsh. I kept quiet. Kyle then told her that she should go home tonight, and that he and Rudi would party again with her sometime in the future. I sighed and shook my head at him, asking him to give me and Amber a moment. He nodded his head and made his way out. He told me he felt like an ass, and I told him not to worry it's not his fault. I just want to get her home.
I stood next to her and just waited. She looked up at me and told me that she knows she is selfish, but if she wanted to change she would have a long time ago. I told her that I don't expect her to change, I just expect her to be logical and come home. She changed.
Amber: "I don't know why you like me. I don't like you, I don't want to hook up with you, I don't want you to buy me drinks and I don't want to kiss you."
Me: "You don't? Thats strange, because you let me buy you a lot of drinks (my mistake) and you even kissed me."
Amber: "Yeah well. I only do it because I feel sorry for you."
Thats the last thing I expected to hear. That was a real low blow and it hurt. I just stood there, letting it sink in. "Where is Robs?" She asked. I didn't listen. I walked away and left her.
I was shaking again, fighting my hardest to hold my emotions in. I went to the entrance and stood with Robs and Kyle. Amber came down a few minutes later, looking like she was at least ready to go. A song came on and Robs asked Amber to dance. I sighed, because she was finally ready to go. Robs realised this and felt bad, but I told her not to worry, I'll be waiting at the entrance when they are done. It was just me and Kyle. I chatted to him. I always used to chat to Kyle about Amber when me and him did kickboxing together. He knows a lot about us, and he knows exactly how I feel about her. I told him what just happened and he shook his head. I also told him that this was probably exactly what I needed to get over her, because enough is enough. Surprisingly he looked shocked, because I doubt ever imagined me saying I'd get over Amber.
Robs and Amber to the entrance after their song. They said bye to everybody and went to my car. I was quiet. I didn't want to say anything. Nobody said anything as I drove. I dropped Robs off and then proceeded to take Amber home. She turned and stared at me. I didn't turn and ignored her. We got to her house and I took her house keys from her. As I was unlocking her front door she hugged me from behind. I ignored it and carried on unlocking. She went straight to the bathroom once in. I went to the couch and waited for her. I wish I could just be an asshole and tune her off, I really do. Its not in my nature, I just don't have it in me. She got out of the bathroom and walked into the lounge. I got up and told her to please let me out. She stood there. I walked, about to get past her and grabbed me and hugged me. I just stood there, not moving my arms at all. She didn't let go forever. I hate it, I wish I could just get over her. She looked up at me and kissed my cheek, before taking my hand and leading me to her room. Any other guy would tell her to piss off, but I'm not like that. Oh how I wish I was.
We went to her room and lay on her bed. She cuddled next to me and took my hand. She started writing out what I assumed was going to be "Im sorry" but she stopped and put my hand down. She then whispered that she was sorry. My response should have been "Like I care/Oh are you feeling sorry for me/screw you/etc" but instead all I could say was "Its ok." Wtf is wrong with me? I don't know...
Anyways we cuddled and slept, and I left at 5 this morning. I hope she doesn't now assume things are ok between us, because they are not. I lost interest in her, because I saw a different person last night. God help me get over her, please I'm begging you, because no matter how much she screws me over or says horrible things, I can't help but love her. Its a curse, and I hope it will go away.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Dear Blog, I Am Cheating On You, With ANOTHER Blog. :O!
Hi Guys :)
LONG time no chat and all that sort of thing. The truth is, as Sage pointed out to me the other day, is that I am neglecting this blog, because I am giving more attention to my "Book Blog". Book Blog being the book I am working on, but presented as a diary, or more so a blog from my main character. If you do miss reading my blog often, I do apologise. I will hopefully be rectifying that, and paying equal attention to my life (this blog) and my fake life (the other blog) ok that all seemed quite confusing but at least its out of the way now :)
I held back on posting a link to my other blog, merely because I wanted it to have a teeny weeny bit of bulk for you to enjoy. I am giving you the link today, and I hope you enjoy reading the nonsense I am writing. Even if this book amounts to nothing, I am having a huge amount of fun writing it! So without further ado, I present to you, My ongoing diary/blog/book thing of my as yet, no name character. I hope you bookmark it, and comment whenever (if ever) you have something to say. Please remember that the blog goes chronologically, so you should start from the very first post :P just follow the shortcuts on the right.
http://hairybook.blog.com/
Also, I ask that you do not plagiarize or anything in any way (not that anybody would :P) but you never know.
Anyhoo so a quick update on my life. Let me get Amber out the way quick. I have not seen her for around 3 weeks now. A part of me misses her, but another part can actually stomach the fact that if I stay away from her long enough, I may just get over her which is probably good for me. Doubt her scarcity will keep up though, she goes on 6 weeks holiday this Friday, and I am sure she will have time to hang out and will want to. This Friday also happens to be her birthday, and she is turning 20. That thought alone (of her aging) already seems to upset her, so I don't really know what to expect on the day, let alone what to buy her. News to follow (obviously :P)
I applied for a new job today. I don't really know what it involves (in detail) but my one friend works for this company. He told me they have an opening so I gave him my CV. I have had enough of my company, and am extremely eager for greener pastures, or anything else really.
Wednesday was my birthday. I don't feel that old, but its weird that I am no longer 21. EEEK! I feel all grown up again :) It was the weirdest thing turning 21 last year. After my birthday I felt all full of wisdom and grown up. Then I got over it and reverted to being me, young at heart.
I want to study next year, but what do I study? I know I want to write, but what do I study for JUST writing. Everybody obviously suggests journalism, which is cool I guess, but do I really want to be a journalist. I'd love to write magazine articles I reckon, and really love to be an author. Scary... Considering I am 22 now, and still feel nervous for the rest of my life. Doubt anybody ever really is certain about their life ahead.
This is the paragraph I need to put it just to make Chello happy.
And... I'm done. Tried writing another paragraph like 5 times but kept erasing it :O So Until next time :)
Fig
LONG time no chat and all that sort of thing. The truth is, as Sage pointed out to me the other day, is that I am neglecting this blog, because I am giving more attention to my "Book Blog". Book Blog being the book I am working on, but presented as a diary, or more so a blog from my main character. If you do miss reading my blog often, I do apologise. I will hopefully be rectifying that, and paying equal attention to my life (this blog) and my fake life (the other blog) ok that all seemed quite confusing but at least its out of the way now :)
I held back on posting a link to my other blog, merely because I wanted it to have a teeny weeny bit of bulk for you to enjoy. I am giving you the link today, and I hope you enjoy reading the nonsense I am writing. Even if this book amounts to nothing, I am having a huge amount of fun writing it! So without further ado, I present to you, My ongoing diary/blog/book thing of my as yet, no name character. I hope you bookmark it, and comment whenever (if ever) you have something to say. Please remember that the blog goes chronologically, so you should start from the very first post :P just follow the shortcuts on the right.
http://hairybook.blog.com/
Also, I ask that you do not plagiarize or anything in any way (not that anybody would :P) but you never know.
Anyhoo so a quick update on my life. Let me get Amber out the way quick. I have not seen her for around 3 weeks now. A part of me misses her, but another part can actually stomach the fact that if I stay away from her long enough, I may just get over her which is probably good for me. Doubt her scarcity will keep up though, she goes on 6 weeks holiday this Friday, and I am sure she will have time to hang out and will want to. This Friday also happens to be her birthday, and she is turning 20. That thought alone (of her aging) already seems to upset her, so I don't really know what to expect on the day, let alone what to buy her. News to follow (obviously :P)
I applied for a new job today. I don't really know what it involves (in detail) but my one friend works for this company. He told me they have an opening so I gave him my CV. I have had enough of my company, and am extremely eager for greener pastures, or anything else really.
Wednesday was my birthday. I don't feel that old, but its weird that I am no longer 21. EEEK! I feel all grown up again :) It was the weirdest thing turning 21 last year. After my birthday I felt all full of wisdom and grown up. Then I got over it and reverted to being me, young at heart.
I want to study next year, but what do I study? I know I want to write, but what do I study for JUST writing. Everybody obviously suggests journalism, which is cool I guess, but do I really want to be a journalist. I'd love to write magazine articles I reckon, and really love to be an author. Scary... Considering I am 22 now, and still feel nervous for the rest of my life. Doubt anybody ever really is certain about their life ahead.
This is the paragraph I need to put it just to make Chello happy.
And... I'm done. Tried writing another paragraph like 5 times but kept erasing it :O So Until next time :)
Fig
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Moving Out!
WEEEEH!
Now thats off my chest, onwards! So I totally kicked my works ass this week. That morning I had to work? Well that really REALLY didn't go well. I couldn't help but laugh though. I was being crapped out for something that wasn't my fault over the phone. For some reason I didn't retaliate. All I could do was smile, nod my head and be like "I'm sorry. Mmmmhmmmm. Will get right on it." Turns out, that this lady (not my boss, one of my clients) was crying over spilt milk. I wasn't even needed at the end of the day, and I got crapped out for nothing. I wonder how she must feel now. I ALSO found out that she knew about this event a week ago. So why the hell would she wait for the day before to send an email. Why wouldn't she pick up a phone in a few hours if nobody replied to the mail? Who knows, I don't know how some people work. This is a rant I know, its more for me then it is for you :P I'm done now.
Amber started chatting to me out of the blue today on FB chat. I always get a little annoyed because lately she never ever talks to me unless she wants something, so I was kind of expecting her to ask me for whatever it was thats she wanted. Surprisingly we just chatted random rubbish briefly before she said that she has to go and shower. She didn't even end up saying bye. a little bit later, she wrote on like a lot of her friends walls, just randomly. Asking some how they are, telling others they are awesome, etc. She got around to writing on mine, and all she had so say was, well, ask me what I want for my birthday (which is next Wednesday). I was just like O_o lol. Don't know why I added this, guess it bothered me a little on the inside. Anyhoo, I don't want anything for my birthday. Hers is 9 days after mine, wonder what I must get her.
Chello told me that he is going to start running. I was thinking about it, my only exercise is soccer once a week and the odd gym session I drag myself to. Other then that, during work I walk a hell of a lot. According to Gruff (who all girls seem to instantly love :P Its his asian charm I tell you) girls go crazy over calf muscles. I just get pictures of girls with hearts in their eyes, staring at a guys calves. Its so funny! If this is true, then I must admit, my walking helps a lot with that. Girls also seem to like a killer body, and although I do not have a six pack, My tummy is flat and does have a muscular outline :P thats good enough for me. Besides, I am expecting the lady I marry to love me for me, not my abs or my calves. I have no idea what Chello looks like in real life, it doesn't matter though, all the girls like him for the way he rolls his r's :P
Back to work, I just realised that I have gotten most of my work done this week, and have very little to do tomorrow. So that is an awesome bonus and on top of that I am off on Friday. LONG WEEKEND! I have a number for another place I am hoping to get a job at. I am going to call them tomorrow and send them my CV. Hold thumbs for me please!
Other then that, I am feeling a lot happier lately, I am just taking one day of my life at a time. But I am moving out from the old and into the new.
Now thats off my chest, onwards! So I totally kicked my works ass this week. That morning I had to work? Well that really REALLY didn't go well. I couldn't help but laugh though. I was being crapped out for something that wasn't my fault over the phone. For some reason I didn't retaliate. All I could do was smile, nod my head and be like "I'm sorry. Mmmmhmmmm. Will get right on it." Turns out, that this lady (not my boss, one of my clients) was crying over spilt milk. I wasn't even needed at the end of the day, and I got crapped out for nothing. I wonder how she must feel now. I ALSO found out that she knew about this event a week ago. So why the hell would she wait for the day before to send an email. Why wouldn't she pick up a phone in a few hours if nobody replied to the mail? Who knows, I don't know how some people work. This is a rant I know, its more for me then it is for you :P I'm done now.
Amber started chatting to me out of the blue today on FB chat. I always get a little annoyed because lately she never ever talks to me unless she wants something, so I was kind of expecting her to ask me for whatever it was thats she wanted. Surprisingly we just chatted random rubbish briefly before she said that she has to go and shower. She didn't even end up saying bye. a little bit later, she wrote on like a lot of her friends walls, just randomly. Asking some how they are, telling others they are awesome, etc. She got around to writing on mine, and all she had so say was, well, ask me what I want for my birthday (which is next Wednesday). I was just like O_o lol. Don't know why I added this, guess it bothered me a little on the inside. Anyhoo, I don't want anything for my birthday. Hers is 9 days after mine, wonder what I must get her.
Chello told me that he is going to start running. I was thinking about it, my only exercise is soccer once a week and the odd gym session I drag myself to. Other then that, during work I walk a hell of a lot. According to Gruff (who all girls seem to instantly love :P Its his asian charm I tell you) girls go crazy over calf muscles. I just get pictures of girls with hearts in their eyes, staring at a guys calves. Its so funny! If this is true, then I must admit, my walking helps a lot with that. Girls also seem to like a killer body, and although I do not have a six pack, My tummy is flat and does have a muscular outline :P thats good enough for me. Besides, I am expecting the lady I marry to love me for me, not my abs or my calves. I have no idea what Chello looks like in real life, it doesn't matter though, all the girls like him for the way he rolls his r's :P
Back to work, I just realised that I have gotten most of my work done this week, and have very little to do tomorrow. So that is an awesome bonus and on top of that I am off on Friday. LONG WEEKEND! I have a number for another place I am hoping to get a job at. I am going to call them tomorrow and send them my CV. Hold thumbs for me please!
Other then that, I am feeling a lot happier lately, I am just taking one day of my life at a time. But I am moving out from the old and into the new.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Oh Look a Keyboard!
Man I realised today that my last blog was close to two weeks ago. I really don't know what happened to last week. I spend the whole week being super busy workwise, and then Friday-Sunday at home being home sick with flu. I'm still not fully recovered mind you, but I am feeling a lot better.
So remember that event Amber invited me to which I thought was just going to be us two and it actually wasn't? Well get this, everybody ditched (Amber included because she was sick that day) so it ended up just being me and Robs. It was cool to hang out alone with Robs I must admit, I find that I am pretty open to her about most things in my life, which is strange because these days I hardly talk to Amber, who I am pretty much the most open with. It feels like Robs at least has time to listen so I don't mind chatting to her. Amber is too busy with college, as is Gruff. My two closest friends, too busy for anything else. I can't wait for the world cup, they will then be on six weeks of holiday. I don't blame them for being scarce, I understand that college is college and they are drowning in work. It doesn't change the fact that I really do feel lonely without seeing them as often as I am used to.
Eggs and Rice. Must get started but I keep procrastinating.
My job really peed me off today. I get a call at 8pm from my boss, telling me one of our clients wants us to set up at a golf day tomorrow at 7am. Oh, and don't forget that we have nothing to set up with, so my boss went and assured our client that we would organise something. No wait lets rephrase that: That she would just get ME to do something and she wouldn't have to do anything O_o it's just so frustrating... New job hunt begins TOMORROW!
I went with my sister to drop off something at her new boyfriends house today. My sister has been through so much, and so being the younger brother, I am actually very protective of her even though I don't show it. I must admit, I really like this guy though and I feel that they are right for each other. I don't know why, I just get this feeling in my gut. I really think he will look after her. Well heres to hoping at least.
I started writing a 3rd book :x I am actually proud of myself because I am constantly adding to it (its kind of a requirement) so only time will tell. I will post the link on here soon once Its a bit bulkier on word count :)
I read another friend of mines blog today (he just started one) and believe it or not, one of his early posts is about a girl he likes. I just laughed, because that is like the 3rd blog I have read from a male, that talks about a girl, or girls in general. You can count mine as 4. Seems most guys just want to be the knight in shining armour looking for their princess. I only seem to know good guys, because I doubt I would be friends with a guy who treats girls like dirt, although I do know a guy who likes hitting on girls lots O_o I should sort him out sometimes.
World cup fever is slowly setting in here in South Africa. I must admit that I find it funny how most South Africans are now all of a sudden passionate about our country. With cars driving around with flags and South African merchandise all over it. I'm not against it, but I am glad that people are finally getting behind our team. Lets hope they don't ashame us during the competition, because in all honesty they are not that great, but I know that when they play with their hearts and soul they actually do flipping well. so, GO SOUTH AFRICA! If they do fail though at least I can support Portugal, assuming they aren't on bad form either.
Regardless of what people may say or think about me and Amber, I really really really miss her and spending time with her. I hope she knows though, that I am insanely proud of her and what she is doing this year. I didn't expect her to be half as dedicated to college as she is, but I know she is working her ass off.
I think thats all I have for now. Sage is talking random stuff to me over steam now (something we are actually good at doing O_o exchanging absolutely irrelevant information with each other), Chello is whining about his stats in HoN (online game, in case you forgot). At the end of the day (which is 45 mins from now) I need sleep to be up early tomorrow for lame work, so goodnight :) have an awesome week!
So remember that event Amber invited me to which I thought was just going to be us two and it actually wasn't? Well get this, everybody ditched (Amber included because she was sick that day) so it ended up just being me and Robs. It was cool to hang out alone with Robs I must admit, I find that I am pretty open to her about most things in my life, which is strange because these days I hardly talk to Amber, who I am pretty much the most open with. It feels like Robs at least has time to listen so I don't mind chatting to her. Amber is too busy with college, as is Gruff. My two closest friends, too busy for anything else. I can't wait for the world cup, they will then be on six weeks of holiday. I don't blame them for being scarce, I understand that college is college and they are drowning in work. It doesn't change the fact that I really do feel lonely without seeing them as often as I am used to.
Eggs and Rice. Must get started but I keep procrastinating.
My job really peed me off today. I get a call at 8pm from my boss, telling me one of our clients wants us to set up at a golf day tomorrow at 7am. Oh, and don't forget that we have nothing to set up with, so my boss went and assured our client that we would organise something. No wait lets rephrase that: That she would just get ME to do something and she wouldn't have to do anything O_o it's just so frustrating... New job hunt begins TOMORROW!
I went with my sister to drop off something at her new boyfriends house today. My sister has been through so much, and so being the younger brother, I am actually very protective of her even though I don't show it. I must admit, I really like this guy though and I feel that they are right for each other. I don't know why, I just get this feeling in my gut. I really think he will look after her. Well heres to hoping at least.
I started writing a 3rd book :x I am actually proud of myself because I am constantly adding to it (its kind of a requirement) so only time will tell. I will post the link on here soon once Its a bit bulkier on word count :)
I read another friend of mines blog today (he just started one) and believe it or not, one of his early posts is about a girl he likes. I just laughed, because that is like the 3rd blog I have read from a male, that talks about a girl, or girls in general. You can count mine as 4. Seems most guys just want to be the knight in shining armour looking for their princess. I only seem to know good guys, because I doubt I would be friends with a guy who treats girls like dirt, although I do know a guy who likes hitting on girls lots O_o I should sort him out sometimes.
World cup fever is slowly setting in here in South Africa. I must admit that I find it funny how most South Africans are now all of a sudden passionate about our country. With cars driving around with flags and South African merchandise all over it. I'm not against it, but I am glad that people are finally getting behind our team. Lets hope they don't ashame us during the competition, because in all honesty they are not that great, but I know that when they play with their hearts and soul they actually do flipping well. so, GO SOUTH AFRICA! If they do fail though at least I can support Portugal, assuming they aren't on bad form either.
Regardless of what people may say or think about me and Amber, I really really really miss her and spending time with her. I hope she knows though, that I am insanely proud of her and what she is doing this year. I didn't expect her to be half as dedicated to college as she is, but I know she is working her ass off.
I think thats all I have for now. Sage is talking random stuff to me over steam now (something we are actually good at doing O_o exchanging absolutely irrelevant information with each other), Chello is whining about his stats in HoN (online game, in case you forgot). At the end of the day (which is 45 mins from now) I need sleep to be up early tomorrow for lame work, so goodnight :) have an awesome week!
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Women: The Good, The Bad, And the Worst
HI GUISE! :D
So interesting things happened tonight. I spoke about how Chello is over girls, and I am still in the middle with Amber, and I did indeed forget to mention that Xander was also going through some tricksy problems of his own. So where do I start?
The Good: Xander has immense feelings for a girl in his school. I won't go into too much detail, because thats a story that has too much volume for my tiny blog :P I don't know all the tiny details myself anyways. The point is that this girl generally didn't treat Xander like she cared, and it really affected him in a negative way. Long story short, something happened, she cried over it and was really hurt. Then Xander and her made up, and agreed to be friends, which at least helped him out in a huge way. He seems super happy again, like a huge weight has been lifted off his shoulders.
The Bad: I mentioned last night that there was a chance I would be seeing Amber tomorrow night. Well at the end of the day I am, which is super cool, but it won't be just us two. She asked me tonight if I would mind giving her and her best friend Robs a lift there and back. Gruff and Niel will also be there. This is all cool, I really don't mind, but how can she not mention this to me in her sms? It really felt like her sms was addressed to me personally, and not a bulk sms sent to a few people. It also annoys me that she just asked for a lift out of nowhere now. It almost feels like I was just invited as a convenience (although I know it probably wasn't) this isn't really bad, but I was really hoping for some alone time with her. Oh well -_- not to mention the fact that when I am with her and Robs, I am kind of like the spare wheel.
The Worst: I mentioned Chello in my blog last night with him and his relationship (or lack of) with Pascal. She told him that she just wants to be friends with him. Well tonight, Chello found out that she did most definitely hook up with his friend Petri, and that he in fact asked her out. This really is like a total low blow to Chello. WHILE they were "unofficially" dating, she decided to just slow it down and be friends. Barely a week later, she is dating his (now ex) friend Petri. Chello deleted her off mxit and facebook. She sent him a message over facebook though, which he sent me. I'll just copy some extracts and paste them here:
"if you care for me and want me to be happy u should be happy for us, coz he asked me out and i said yes. and i like him. alot. and i want me and u to be happy and uncomplicated and i want you to be hppy for me and him since i'm happy for you. and this is somehtign that just happened, hes got nothign to do with the fact that me and u didnt work out, it jsut so happened to be the right timing. mwah"
I know its hard to make sense of her random typing, but you get the gist of it. It just irritates me how she just used Chello, and now is all of a sudden in love with his best friend. Really, how naive can you be?
I know its random, but all these things seemed to happen tonight (or in the span of 24 hours). Xander making up with Toine, Amber telling me other people will be joining us, and Chello finding out that Pascal is a bit of a *insert bad word here*. Thought it would make for an interesting read :) I find it interesting how we are all on different levels of relationships (or now friendships or lack thereof.) Lets see whats to come...
So interesting things happened tonight. I spoke about how Chello is over girls, and I am still in the middle with Amber, and I did indeed forget to mention that Xander was also going through some tricksy problems of his own. So where do I start?
The Good: Xander has immense feelings for a girl in his school. I won't go into too much detail, because thats a story that has too much volume for my tiny blog :P I don't know all the tiny details myself anyways. The point is that this girl generally didn't treat Xander like she cared, and it really affected him in a negative way. Long story short, something happened, she cried over it and was really hurt. Then Xander and her made up, and agreed to be friends, which at least helped him out in a huge way. He seems super happy again, like a huge weight has been lifted off his shoulders.
The Bad: I mentioned last night that there was a chance I would be seeing Amber tomorrow night. Well at the end of the day I am, which is super cool, but it won't be just us two. She asked me tonight if I would mind giving her and her best friend Robs a lift there and back. Gruff and Niel will also be there. This is all cool, I really don't mind, but how can she not mention this to me in her sms? It really felt like her sms was addressed to me personally, and not a bulk sms sent to a few people. It also annoys me that she just asked for a lift out of nowhere now. It almost feels like I was just invited as a convenience (although I know it probably wasn't) this isn't really bad, but I was really hoping for some alone time with her. Oh well -_- not to mention the fact that when I am with her and Robs, I am kind of like the spare wheel.
The Worst: I mentioned Chello in my blog last night with him and his relationship (or lack of) with Pascal. She told him that she just wants to be friends with him. Well tonight, Chello found out that she did most definitely hook up with his friend Petri, and that he in fact asked her out. This really is like a total low blow to Chello. WHILE they were "unofficially" dating, she decided to just slow it down and be friends. Barely a week later, she is dating his (now ex) friend Petri. Chello deleted her off mxit and facebook. She sent him a message over facebook though, which he sent me. I'll just copy some extracts and paste them here:
"if you care for me and want me to be happy u should be happy for us, coz he asked me out and i said yes. and i like him. alot. and i want me and u to be happy and uncomplicated and i want you to be hppy for me and him since i'm happy for you. and this is somehtign that just happened, hes got nothign to do with the fact that me and u didnt work out, it jsut so happened to be the right timing. mwah"
I know its hard to make sense of her random typing, but you get the gist of it. It just irritates me how she just used Chello, and now is all of a sudden in love with his best friend. Really, how naive can you be?
I know its random, but all these things seemed to happen tonight (or in the span of 24 hours). Xander making up with Toine, Amber telling me other people will be joining us, and Chello finding out that Pascal is a bit of a *insert bad word here*. Thought it would make for an interesting read :) I find it interesting how we are all on different levels of relationships (or now friendships or lack thereof.) Lets see whats to come...
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Good Thing Sipho Was Outside On The Treadmill Making This Internet Connection Possible ^_^
I'm still alive! Sorry I have been so scarce, I have just been so super busy. The times I do have to blog, I tend to spend playing games online. I have a friend named Chello, who I have never met before, who stays in Cape Town. We met while playing games online and we chat about our lives and random stuff like every day now. The point though is that it is impossible for me to be online without Chello demanding that I join him in a game of HoN. Unfortunately there is always that itch to play so I tend to choose playing over writing, which isn't good I know :) I just need balance out both. Chello always chats to me online though, always about random stuff. When we do talk about serious stuff though, it always ends up that I chat about Amber and he talks about a girl in his life Pascal. What else do guys talk about when they are serious? Only girls...
Chello really liked this girl Pascal, but then she ended up telling him that they should just be friends (after they had a bit of an unofficial relationship or whatever you want to call it.) She went behind his back though and ended up hooking up with Chello's one friend. That really affected him, and now he doesn't trust women at all. In fact so much so that he keeps telling me to just not chat to Amber at all and get over her, because she will probably pull a Pascal on me and hurt me. It's not like she hasn't hurt me before, but I still refuse to listen to him. He raises such a good point though. Most girls always whine about how guys can be such jerks and screw them over. You know why it happens though? When every guy is innocent and still in their teens or just out of their teens (like me :P I'm 21) some of us actually know how to treat girls very well. We treat them with respect, spoil them, look after them and let them know they are loved. Based on mine and Chello's experiences, and various other male friends I know, this always seems to have us being shook off and being hurt. It's really not nice... I can't even begin to explain how sometimes I just think about maybe if I am an ass to Amber, she will pay me the attention that I crave, and the love that I want. I would never resort to that though, I am not a typical guy. Anyways I know this is a rant, and the moral is that girls should just really treausre guys that go the extra mile for them. I have done so much for Amber that I don't expect in return, but I must admit that sometimes I just wish she would show that she appreciates me a bit more then she does. A random sms here and there, a random thank you for everything... that kind of thing would make me so happy. Chello will really take some time before he trusts girls again though, I don't blame him. Pascal is a confusing female and she hurt him.
In other news, I have not hung out with Amber for ages. She asked me if I want to go out with her this Thursday evening. I'm all keen, but I'm not getting my hopes up for us being alone, for all I know it was just a normal invite sms she sent to various people. I hope its just us two though, I miss seeing her alone.
JuicyFig you really will have to help me here. In the game of HoN we played tonight there was an American playing. He casually went on and on and on to tell us that we are a pathetic nation. We are all black and the rest of the world doesn't care about our crappy country. He also went on to say that we can't afford the internet and we all suck. Yeah well done genius, its not like we were connected to the internet to be on the receiving end of your useless racist remarks. It doesn't take a lot to make me angry, but I must admit that it got my blood boiling. South Africa is one of the most amazing places in the world, with a big variety of people. I sometimes don't understand how people overseas (mainly the Americans) have such a lack of knowledge about the rest of the world. Do they really think we stay in huts and have like no sort of buildings or technology? That we just have animals strolling around casually? Granted we aren't as up to date as the rest of the world, but we are not from the stone age -_- I just love South Africa I guess, such an awesome place! Does the world know that? Or do they just see us as another African country?
For those of your blogs that I haven't yet commented on, fear not! I will be reading them soon :) until another time... goodnight!
Chello really liked this girl Pascal, but then she ended up telling him that they should just be friends (after they had a bit of an unofficial relationship or whatever you want to call it.) She went behind his back though and ended up hooking up with Chello's one friend. That really affected him, and now he doesn't trust women at all. In fact so much so that he keeps telling me to just not chat to Amber at all and get over her, because she will probably pull a Pascal on me and hurt me. It's not like she hasn't hurt me before, but I still refuse to listen to him. He raises such a good point though. Most girls always whine about how guys can be such jerks and screw them over. You know why it happens though? When every guy is innocent and still in their teens or just out of their teens (like me :P I'm 21) some of us actually know how to treat girls very well. We treat them with respect, spoil them, look after them and let them know they are loved. Based on mine and Chello's experiences, and various other male friends I know, this always seems to have us being shook off and being hurt. It's really not nice... I can't even begin to explain how sometimes I just think about maybe if I am an ass to Amber, she will pay me the attention that I crave, and the love that I want. I would never resort to that though, I am not a typical guy. Anyways I know this is a rant, and the moral is that girls should just really treausre guys that go the extra mile for them. I have done so much for Amber that I don't expect in return, but I must admit that sometimes I just wish she would show that she appreciates me a bit more then she does. A random sms here and there, a random thank you for everything... that kind of thing would make me so happy. Chello will really take some time before he trusts girls again though, I don't blame him. Pascal is a confusing female and she hurt him.
In other news, I have not hung out with Amber for ages. She asked me if I want to go out with her this Thursday evening. I'm all keen, but I'm not getting my hopes up for us being alone, for all I know it was just a normal invite sms she sent to various people. I hope its just us two though, I miss seeing her alone.
JuicyFig you really will have to help me here. In the game of HoN we played tonight there was an American playing. He casually went on and on and on to tell us that we are a pathetic nation. We are all black and the rest of the world doesn't care about our crappy country. He also went on to say that we can't afford the internet and we all suck. Yeah well done genius, its not like we were connected to the internet to be on the receiving end of your useless racist remarks. It doesn't take a lot to make me angry, but I must admit that it got my blood boiling. South Africa is one of the most amazing places in the world, with a big variety of people. I sometimes don't understand how people overseas (mainly the Americans) have such a lack of knowledge about the rest of the world. Do they really think we stay in huts and have like no sort of buildings or technology? That we just have animals strolling around casually? Granted we aren't as up to date as the rest of the world, but we are not from the stone age -_- I just love South Africa I guess, such an awesome place! Does the world know that? Or do they just see us as another African country?
For those of your blogs that I haven't yet commented on, fear not! I will be reading them soon :) until another time... goodnight!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
About Me
- HairyKnees
- South Africa
- BA English and Communication graduate. I like to write stuff!