1 February 2010

One can offer wonder where exactly is it that time goes to? I find that I'm such a pro at procrastination, I'm the best there is! I am always one to say what I want to do, or where I want to be, but I know I am so bad on the follow through.

It is already month two of this supposed big year. Now I am not saying that I have given up, but damn, where did January go?? It feels like yesterday that I was blogging about studying this year or doing something. I blinked and HEY PRESTO! February arrives at my doorstep. Seems I am a pretty damn good magician too.

So enough is enough, I hope I am not procrastinating right now as I type this, and I damn well hope that I stick to this. I am tired of watching life pass me by, sick of seeing the days of the calendar fly off the wall, and over having nothing to show for what I have done with my time here. Something inspired me today, or is fueling my current mood. I so wish I could harness it and feel like this forever, because I know if I felt like this every day, maybe I would strive towards something, and get on with my life.

I find I am pretty decent at sticking to my New Years Resolutions, as of two years ago when I actually started setting them. So, this is my new one for this year, even though it is February. I WILL finish at LEAST one chapter of my book EVERY month NO MATTER how busy I am. The only thing that can stop me is writers block, but lets see how everything goes. I am also quite frankly sick of certain people not showing any kind of support to me. I have people who tell me I am a great writer, and I really appreciate that. Yet, how can they say such things when they barely or have NEVER read anything that I have put up for everybody to see. I can't do this kind of thing alone, I NEED feedback, I NEED to talk about my characters and how to grow my story. I can't exactly do that when the people I think are close to me couldn't care less at all =/ I know this may sound selfish, but its really not -_- I go out of my way to support people if they are passionate about something, because I know what it feels like to not get any kind of praise or feedback, it just frustrates me that I don't get any in return.

Well this really did turn into a rant :x guess I am just in a bad mood - very rare for me :) just confused with life, love, and the world as we know it. A good nights sleep should sort this all out.